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PrintGood News Wednesday - The Cowboy and the Rancher's Wife
News Type: Event — Wed Apr 1, 2009 9:40 PM EDT
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A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.
She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.
Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.
He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the r anch was doing very well.
Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, 'You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great You should go into town and kick up your heels.'
The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand. Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.
She quietly called him over to her. 'Unbutton my blouse and take it off,' she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.
'Now take off my boots.' He did as she asked, ever so slowly.
Now take off my stockings.' He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.
'Now take off my skirt.' He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.
'Now take off my bra.' Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.
Then she looked at him and said, 'If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired.'
--------
A little humor to start your Wednesday off-this was sent to me by a friend. Wishing you a wonderful Good News Wednesday!
Your turn - make us laugh!
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- Spikegary's Column, All of Newsvine
- Groups: Good News Wednesday, Good News Week.
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- Public Discussion (21)
- Good News Wednesday
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{"commentId":6224087,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
This is all in fun-please feel free to leave your own and make us laugh. CoH will be enforced as needed.
{"commentId":6224087,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"spikegary"}
- 5 votes
#1 - Mon Mar 30, 2009 7:43 AM EDT{"commentId":6364253,"authorDomain":"computersplus99"}
Good story and funny...
heard this one?
"A termite walks into the saloon and asks...
...is the bar tender here"?
{"commentId":6364253,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"computersplus99"}
- 4 votes
{"commentId":6365718,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6376594,"authorDomain":"KimmieLynn"}
Ohhh noo I had to read that one 2 times before I got it ! Funny ! Bar Tender ? Haaa haaa ha !
{"commentId":6376594,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"KimmieLynn"}
- 3 votes
{"commentId":6272701,"authorDomain":"dd-evans69301"}
Too funny! LOL. Thanks for the much needed laugh! :)
{"commentId":6272701,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"dd-evans69301"}
- 4 votes
#2 - Wed Apr 1, 2009 10:07 PM EDT{"commentId":6272808,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6272780,"authorDomain":"sorrelen"}
What a hoot!
{"commentId":6272780,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"sorrelen"}
- 4 votes
#3 - Wed Apr 1, 2009 10:13 PM EDT{"commentId":6272815,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6281068,"authorDomain":"sorrelen"}
Yeah I actually had to delete my original link and reseed it. There were no comments except by me so I finally got some visitors after reseeding it. Thanks anyway for the help.
{"commentId":6281068,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"sorrelen"}
- 1 vote
{"commentId":6274030,"authorDomain":"abcrow"}
Love it Gary *smiles*
{"commentId":6274030,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"abcrow"}
- 4 votes
#4 - Wed Apr 1, 2009 11:51 PM EDT{"commentId":6281019,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6275699,"authorDomain":"moldor"}
OK, I'll bite.....
NEW CHEMICAL ELEMENT
Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium ( symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons , 88 deputy neutrons , and 198 assistant deputy neutrons , giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons , which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years . It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places .
In fact, Governmentium' s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons , forming isodopes . This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass . When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many peons, but twice as many morons.
{"commentId":6275699,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"moldor"}
- 5 votes
#5 - Thu Apr 2, 2009 4:30 AM EDT{"commentId":6275907,"authorDomain":"fairiemagic5"}
Loved it moldor. Heavy indeed. Sounds as if it could become a disease propagated by inattention as well.
Funny ranch story too. Unexpected.
{"commentId":6275907,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"fairiemagic5"}
- 1 vote
{"commentId":6281059,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6280458,"authorDomain":"KimmieLynn"}
OMGoodness I laughed so hard I thought I was going to wet my pants....I will be putting this in my ever growing arsenal of jokes !
{"commentId":6280458,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"KimmieLynn"}
- 3 votes
#6 - Thu Apr 2, 2009 12:18 PM EDT{"commentId":6281172,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6286724,"authorDomain":"dd-evans69301"}
Haha Gary! Good one....didn't see that coming but laughed so hard my side hurt! Thanks!
Hey Kimmie...where ya been? :)
{"commentId":6286724,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"dd-evans69301"}
- 3 votes
#7 - Thu Apr 2, 2009 5:42 PM EDT{"commentId":6288310,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6298608,"authorDomain":"KimmieLynn"}
Hi Spike and Tumble....the Salon/ Spa has gone crazy ! Business is unbelievable, I have had to extend hours and live down there basically. Then I had a couple of out of town shoots. Life is hectic but ohhh so good ! =) Thanks for asking... I miss everyone soo much !
{"commentId":6298608,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"KimmieLynn"}
- 3 votes
#8 - Fri Apr 3, 2009 12:41 PM EDT{"commentId":6298899,"authorDomain":"spikegary"}
{"commentId":6381112,"authorDomain":"MrsBrady"}
LMAO ...That was good !! I don't know any jokes normally when I am funny its a accident ..giggles
{"commentId":6381112,"threadId":"541323","contentId":"2617739","authorDomain":"MrsBrady"}
- 2 votes
#9 - Wed Apr 8, 2009 3:29 PM EDT{"canLink":false,"threadId":"541323","isPrivate":false}
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